Testing Testing

1-2-3.

Trixie's new invention:

bookends chaped like penguins marketed as Penguends.

eh? eh?

And then

Iggy stepped in his own poop and got angry with me when had to clean his back leg.
(not a dream)
Today I might teach my class a simple game if there is lots of time left, and I'll see if they can
figure out a winning strategy for the first player.

Latest dream

Trix and I happened to be near this local rundown clothing store (which may not even exist).
It purported to be some sort of yarn and craft emporium but inside it looked like a dingy collection of used clothes that were not handmade at all. The proprietress offered trix a chance to buy shares of the business and eventually take it over, and she signed a contract. She showed it to me excitedly "I agree to pay 2006 dollars for a fifth of the business". I thought umm... do we have 2006 dollars to be spending on a fifth of this decrepit business? I thought: well with 8000 more, she can have the whole thing and make it into an actual nice crafts store. A few days later, she came back to start changing out the inventory and turning things around. She asked about getting a fifth of the profits from the past few days and the 4/5 owner said "there are none!. I haven't sold anything in weeks!" then laughed. We threw out all the old dingy clothes, scrounged up some nicer items to put on sale, then fixed up a sandwich board to put out on the road saying "NEW STORE! STOP IN AND SEE!"
There was a lot of room for improvement and I was actually a little optimistic.

Break out!

my class and I are taking 15.
I should probably make them do
head
shoulders
knees
toes
But most probably will either
sit there
or
piss
or
make a cell phone call

which is ok.

Lock Out!

Well, I went to go check on my classroom this morning. (some winter teaching)
I could see through the window that there was a chalkboard (I hate dry erase) but no chalk
and no eraser. Oh -- and the doors were locked.
So I hunted down maintenance bob to unlock them. Turns out the eraser was just somewhere I couldn't see and there was a piece of chalk hidden in the desk. So I went to get some more chalk. The only chalk in the supply cabinet was multi-colored. All well and good until you try to erase it! The stuff bears a grudge.
I've since sent two more people to seek maintenance bob. I'm sure maintenance bob is appreciating the increase in visitors and business since everyone else in his domain threw up their hands and said "I don't know nothin about it!" when I asked if anyone had a key to the classroom. C'mon. Maintenance man with a belly and beard doesn't know nothin about classroom keys?

Oooops

I dreamt that I was leaving a swank office building. About to walk onto the sidewalk, my celly began to ring. I quickly maneuvered into a glass-walled waiting room to answer the call. It was T. She said "did you get the message I left you on our machine?" I said no, and she told me to dial our number to get it, while still on the phone with her. That didn't work, so I asked her to just tell me what the message said. She said "Well... there's a problem and I really don't know what to do about it. There's this guy who owns rental properties near hartford. They're $900 a month, but basically condos in a modern development, and you get a $150 dinner for free if you rent one. ... So I said I'd rent one just to get the dinner, and now I don't know how to get out of it."

Two words:

Mad



Libs


(We are going to the have 2day. old friends and new friends will be seen.)

Reams and Reams of Night-Visions

3.2 memorable ones from the not-too-distant past. (as in last night)
one was very visual. I saw two tear-shaped brownish stones jutting out of the water. Then two larger ones in a symmetric extension of the first pair. This kept going, and I had to zoom out to see the new pair every time. Further and further out, as the size of the rocks kept growing, passing truck-sized, and building sized. The curvature of the earth became visible as the rocks became mountain-sized (but mesa shaped), yet still brown flecked with other colors which shone in the "morning" light. Finally, there were two remaining rocks in the pattern that seeemed the size of continents, yet had the same overall shape as each of the rocks from the beginning.
There was a long pause, as though the rocks were saying "Finished. behold our splendor."
Then near the base of the pattern , a brown-skinned man wearing rags popped out of the water and began throwing fish and fishing rods into the air. They, and the subsequent drops of water, looked like claymation or shrinky-dinks and were definitely not in perspective, as they travelled what would have been hundreds of miles on the earths surface, yet looked the same size the whole time.
-----
In another dream, I was in a university (not unlike the one I work at) with an added feature: there were a few market stalls in each department. The one in the physics department seemed to be selling live chickens (though bizarrely kept in an ice chest), exotic vegetables and roots, shrink-wrapped kabobs, and pre-cooked chunks of chicken carved into chicken shapes on skewers. I asked the vendor for some sort of carrot and he disappeared, returning several minutes later with a carrot -- it had been carved into the rear half of a bengal tiger but had a broken penis. I told him that he'd misunderstood and I only wanted the VARIETY of carrot known as tiger carrot, but agreed that I'd to pay the extra $1.50 for the artistry.
I was looking for tamarind, but this vendor didn't have it. I trekked to other departments, but their stalls had far less selection. When I arrived back at the physics department stall, there was a young man in front of me buying a root vegetable about the size of a baby in swaddling clothes with wide flat leaves. I asked him what he was going to cook with it. He was basically going to make a paste out of it. After this brief interaction, he told me that he and his friends aways called me the "gray warrior." Apparently this name was chosen because of a pair of gray pants I have, but the warrior part I decided was their invention.
-----
I was at the liquor store next to the university, trying to pick out some beer. I had about10 dollars. There were some beers I knew I liked, and some other new ones that might be a flop. I decided to get one each of the potential flops and call it a day. (this dream was definitely boring and mundane, but I would like to try the beers in it)
-----
I was walking around campus and decided to check out an area I'd never been to. I saw concession stands selling icecream with a fair number of people around. There were marquees listing the sporting events and their respective locations. I noticed that there was a Jets game happening soon and I was interested to see where the arena was. There was an asphalt path leading up a very steep hill to my left. I started walking (which became climbing) up it. The whole while, a female rent-a-cop was reminding people to make sure they had tickets. Several times I thought I saw her handing someone a ticket out of the corner of my eye. I avoided her because I didn't really want to see the game, but rather the arena. I continued climbing for a long while, and eventually reached the top of the hill. The rentacop caught up with me and handed me a flyer. All you had to do was tear out two coupons whose value added up to $60 and that was good for admission. So i did it. The arena was nowhere in sight. But there was a long covered walkway with smoky glass sidewalls leading off into the distance. I could see others walking along towards an urban-looking area which must house the arena.
I walked a very long while and the path eventually split into two lanes, like a divided highway. Then each lane split further, to keep the foot traffic orderly. It was already a bit crowded and I began to worry about how long it would take to leave when the game was over. at the bottom of a staircase, there was a carnival-type area with games and attractions. I was getting a little disappointed that the arena was yet nowhere in sight.
There was a game I recognized, though I don't know from where... a strongman held another man in his arms. The challenge was to move the held man or make him move. He was very hard to move, as I remembered from my last experience, but I knew a trick that had almost worked. I was going to try it again. I needed to get one of his heels resting on my foot, and then I could use some leverage to lift him off the ground and make him fall.
It worked all too easily and I was even able to pick him up by the ankles and hold him over the ground. He was very distressed and began to whimper, and the strongman got angry with me and made me give him back, yet didn't concede victory.
I stormed off, found a path that supposedly led to the jets game but it seemed to be leading to a beach instead.

...

I just bought coffee and on the counter were the most delicious looking cinnamon buns. I didn't get one.
Last night , between 7:00 and 10:30, I drank a pot of green tea and half a pot of apricot tea. For some reason I was ravenous and ate: 1 buttered roll, turkey, cheese, mashed potatoes, 1 pickle, yogurt.
The season for christmas shopping is upon me.

Yard Sale

In my dream:
It was a warm sunday morning in autumn and I had just bought gas. I noticed across the street there was an interesting looking yardsale. The first thing that caught my eye were these stand-alone kitchen counters with racks behind them, because I knew trixie had wanted one. I was going to take a look and maybe let her know that they had 3 (!) to choose from. But.. as I got out of my truck my eye was caught by a pair of huge conga drums, about 3 feet wide and almost as tall as me. I grabbed a mallet from atop one of them and gave it a test strike. Then I noticed the sign on the other drum that said "please don't play the drums."
I walked into the living room, which was furnished with lots of dark wood and what looked like once-beautiful furniture, and noticed a pile of instruments in the corner. I presumed they were for sale. I noticed a violin case, a guitar case, and what I hoped was a banjo case. But I opened up a mandolin case and took out a very old mandolin. A middle-aged woman came over to me as I was looking at the violin and said "Oh, my husband has wanted to replace a string or something like that , but he's afraid of damaging something, I forget exactly what." The neck was bent but it sounded brilliant. I could see why he was worried about breaking something. I played a little half-ditty and the woman said "would you like a tour of the house?" It sounded like an odd idea, but I decided to be polite and say yes.
As we went up the stairs I saw two men doing some sort of small renovation project. One was on a ladder with a drill, covered with bits of sawdust and wearing a dust mask. I figured he was the man of the house. We arrived on the second floor and I was first shown into the bathroom. It was shaped like a spiral squashed into an obtuse L, with a short wall in the middle. You could walk down to one end of the room, round the corner and head into the shower. I didn't see a showerhead but there was a drain in the floor and rubber matting made of lots of pieces locked together like a half-solved puzzle. My guide explained "that's the shower mat, so you don't slip!" I said "oddly enough, someone I know who looks just like you has a bathroom just like this!" but she didn't seem to care. On the short wall were placed various bathroom accessories like bottles of shampoo or scrubbies etc. On the way out was the traditional bathroom sink set into a wooden counter with a vanity mirror mounted behind it.
Next we went into the kitchen in which two teenage girls were in various stages of sunday morning things. One with long curly dark hair was cutting a fat summer squash, presumably to put in the big pan of sauteeing vegetables which were to fill a mounstrous omelet. The tour guide, now obviously their mother, was sidetracked talking to the other daughter about something. I looked around the kitchen, which had sheetrocked ceilings and a few walls but wooden floors and wooden framing. There were a few large windows above the sink, and lots of little ones here and there, letting in light all over the place. Planters with plants hung from the ceiling and crossbeams, and pots stood in almost every possible spot that wasn't in the way. The phone rang and the cooking girl asked me to hold a big ladleful of chopped vegetables while she talked on the phone. The mother finally noticed this as the phone conversation ended, and mildly scolded her daughter for making such an imposition on a guest. The daughter shrugged it off and went back to stirring, but one could tell the mother wasn't that angry.
Off on the side of the kitchen on a tiled and raised area sat the dinner table, also surrounded by plants. Next to the table was a sliding door that opened out onto a deck also oozing with houseplants. I wondered why they were selling the drums, and thought "T would LOVE having a place like this!"

That crazy sound.

My desk lamp (which hasn't been used in months) has a big shade that wobbles when the table on it wobbles (quite regularly). It was getting on my nerves and reminded me of the times in the past when it's done so. How did I fix it? Oh yeah, just tighten the fastener. duh.
It is a winter wonderland out there today. We might do some mas shopping. I would love a snow day on monday. Watched the pilot of a show called "dead like me" which featured a character who reminded me of steve martin and the co-star on quantum leap.
I am sneaking "Why Cats Paint" off the bookshelf and will try to read it and sneak it back in. Of course, T will know what has transpired due to this here account.

Ich Kann Nicht

I stopped paying attention to Emeril years ago. Why is it that I am still overusing garlic? I even tried to restrain myself, by cleaning 6 cloves and only adding 3. Then I did a taster,and decided to throw in 2 more. It's still a good batch o' mash, but it may be just a lil'bit too garlicky. We'll see what the T-dogg thinks.

A Garlicky Morning

After washing the dog and pooping the dishes, I settled into my primary morning task for today: making garlic mashed potatoes. I don't have the heavy cream which my father would use, so I'm using milk with extra butter. All I can say is that i want to make myself garlic milk for everyday drinking. MMM.
So, in addition to tasting my garlic milk while I wait for the potatoes to be mashable, I had an english muffin covered with pinjur*. It is a very garlicky morning.

*my pinjur has about 3 cloves garlic too many in it. Or: not enough eggplant.